December 31, 2004

The Gift of Hope

I have decided to rename my site. As I was reading Jeremiah 29:11 I realized that Jesus gives us the gift of hope. It is a gift given to us. This hope promises us a future. A future with Him if we have a relationship with Him. He asks us to come to Him just as we are. He will change us. He changed me. Jesus gives us the gift of Hope.

I remember the first time I went to church when I was in college. I had been to Vacation Bible School as a child and I had attended Sunday school every once in a while but I did not go to church very much. My parents did not go to church either. I remember thinking how hard it would to change my old ways but once I accepted Jesus He change me. No, I am not perfect now. I still make mistakes but Jesus gives me the gift of Hope. A Hope for the future.

Facing cancer is a very scary thing. It is the most frightening thing I have ever faced. When my great-grandmother faced death even she was scared. I was with her when she had a mild heart attack in the hospital. She had such a frightened look on her face. I think we all become scared when we are faced with death or something that could cause death but Jesus gives us the gift of Hope. A Hope for the future. He gave my grandmother Hope even when she was frightened. She had Hope and later had a peace. She knew she would spend eternal life with

Cancer will not take away my gift of Hope. Chemo will not take away my gift of Hope. No one can take away my gift of Hope. The day I accepted Jesus as my savior He gave me the gift of Hope. Anyone can have the gift of Hope if you trust in Jesus.

December 27, 2004

Merry Christmas

It has been a while since I last updated because I was a little sick after my first round of chemo. Thursday was my worst day. The meds they gave me made all my bones ache and I top of that I was nauseous. By Christmas I was feeling great! God is good! Phil and I enjoyed Christmas with family and friends and had a great time. Now, I feel wonderful and I am ready to hit the mall to find the bargains!! Let me know if you want to go shopping. :0)

I went to the doctor today and my blood counts were all great. I have been having headaches but the doctor thinks it is probably just a side effect of the chemo. I guess I will just need to keep the Advil close.

God is good and He still continues to work!

December 21, 2004


Yesterday, I had my first day of chemo. It wasn't all that bad. I think I was a little sad to even have to be going through this. It helped having Phil there with me and of course it is nice to know that God promises me a hope for the future from Jeremiah 29:11. I must continue to proclaim that verse.

Phil and I just pretty much laid back and watched TV during chemo. Our friend Rick Long brought us lunch. Thanks Rick. The scariest part for me was having my port stuck with a needle for the very first time. I figured if the port was defective I would know from the first stick. It worked properly and didn't even hurt. God is good!

While we were getting Chemo we ran into a lovely family Rick and Lisa Woodruff and their daughter. This was a God thing. Rick has had Non-Hodgkin's and this summer I stumbled across his website. I read his entire journal and was amazed at how courageous he was and how his Faith sustained him through this entire ordeal. I realize now me finding his website was not by chance. God's hand was in that to help me through this process. Even now Lisa says she can look back now and see so many things God has done through their experience. Please, continue to pray for the Woodruff family.

The fun part was when we got home. Phil and I both thought the Home Health Nurse was coming to flush my port. When we arrived home we had all these medical supplies waiting for us on the front porch. We had syringes, IV fluids, an IV pole, and other misc. supplies. Then Nurse Deb came over and proceeded to tell Phil he would be hooking me up to an IV after each treatment and flushing my port at the end of each treatment. As you can imagine Phil was a little overwhelmed as was I. Well he succeeded and now you can call him Dr. Phil. He did wonderful. I truly am blessed with a wonderful husband.

During the IV I was a little nauseous but not severe. Tim and Kim brought us dinner that was very delicious. I was even able to eat. Thanks Tim and Kim. After my IV was done I felt so good we went to Phil's parents house in Taylorsville and had Christmas with his sister and her family. We had a wonderful time!

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they are good for us-- they help us learn to endure. Romans 5:5 NLT

December 19, 2004

The Day Before Chemo

The day before chemo I went to church. The Crestwood Praise Band sang a wonderful song 'That's Why We Praise Him'. Here are the words:

Verse 1
He came to live, live a perfect life
He came to be the living Word of light
He came to die, so we'd be reconciled
He came to rise to show His power and might
And that's why we praise Him, that's why we sing
That's why we bow down and worship this King
Cause He gave His everything
Cause He gave His everything
Verse 2
He came to live, live again in us
He came to be our conquering King and Friend
He came to heal and show the lost ones His love
He came to go prepare a place for us.

As I listened to this song God reminded me that He gave me everything. He died on a cross for me so that I could live with Him forever. He died for my sins. I must be willing to give Him my everything even during sickness. God has already shown me many things during this. He has shown me that I can only trust Him and be obedient to His word. He will take care of the rest.

Please, pray that I will respond well to treatment. I will keep you posted. If you would like to listen to this song you may click on the link.

December 17, 2004

Christmas Party

Today I spent the afternoon with my students at school. They were all very glad to see me. They had a tremendous time at the Christmas party. This was the first party I have not had to supervise since I began teaching 6 years ago. That was nice. If you are a teacher you know what I mean! It did make me really tired. I didn't realize how tired I was until today. I did find out I will start chemo on Monday at 8:10am. I will get to enjoy 6 hours of treatment. My sister-in-law gave me a book called Bend in the Road by David Jeremiah. He actually had lymphoma. This book is about trials we face. I will be taking that book to read for the day. I can't wait to read it. Thanks Donna! I did find out some good news today. I only have to get chemo every other week. The last time we were at the oncologists office we were given so much information we missed that. I am happy about that. God is good and He still works during bends in the road!

December 16, 2004

Thanksgiving 2004

Thanksgiving 2004 Posted by Hello

I have Hodgkin's Lymphoma

At the beginning of November while at school I came across a lump about the size of a pea in my neck. This was strange to me because I was not prone to swollen glands. I asked a few people about it and they told me if it hadn't disappeared in a few days you might want to go to the doctor and check it out.

A week later, Tuesday and it was still there. So I decided to go to the doctor. I was able to get in to the doctor that evening at 6:15. I felt stupid going to the doctor because I new it was nothing. I even felt like I was wasting the doctor's time since he had many other patients sicker than I.

He asked me the usual questions. Have you felt sick? Night sweats? Weight loss? All of which was no however I have been sweating for years. I have been trying to lose weight. He wanted me to go the hospital that evening and get a chest x-ray and blood work. I thought it was strange that he had me go right then but I was afraid to ask any questions.

On Friday, the doctor's office called back and now wanted me to do a CT scan the following Tuesday, before Thanksgiving. Now I was really getting worried. My husband was also worried. I convinced him it was just routine. I think I tried to convince myself as well.

I got the CT done on Tuesday and figured I would find out the test results on Wednesday. Instead, when I got home the doctor himself had left a message on my answering machine wanting me to call him back. I new this couldn't be good information. I was home alone when I returned his call. The office told me he couldn't come to the phone because he was seeing patients and asked for my name. When I told her my name she decided to let me speak to him. I knew then it wasn't the news I was expecting. He got on the phone and told me he thought I had a type of Lymphoma, cancer of the lymph nodes. He was sorry he had to tell me on the phone but he wanted to get me in to see an oncologist before Thanks giving.

When I hung up the phone the only thing I knew to do was cry. I cried, cried, and cried some more. I wondered how I would tell my husband, Phil. Should I call him or wait for him to come home? Would we still be able to start a family? We were so ready to start a family. I called my friend Paula. She helped me calm down. Paula and her husband Rick came over to comfort me and we waited till Phil came home.

That was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I told Phil and we cried some more together. We prayed together. By the end of the evening we had a peace and new we couldn't do anything until we spoke to the doctor.

On Wednesday before Thanksgiving we in to see the Oncologist. She told us that Lymphomas were very treatable and to think positive. She had us go to a surgeon and a biopsy was scheduled for the following Monday. We found out Wednesday, December 1 it was indeed Hodgkin's Lymphoma.